Self Esteem is Scary but Self Acceptance is Terrifying

Why? Why are these words scary? Have we become so comfortable in pointing out our flaws, dreaming of sometimes unattainable things and spending all our time wishing we were someone else? Is there really something wrong with who you are now?

We always think of these two things as synonymous, but, they're very different things. Self esteem indicates that you understand you are valuable and worthwhile, whether you believe you're highly valuable or not. But, self acceptance requires a deeper understanding of your true and full self. It is knowing that you are you, you understand your weaknesses and your strengths, you don't hold yourself to arbitrary standards set by strangers. You know what you're capable of and not capable of and there is no qualms with that.


This is HARD stuff. I'm not even going to try to be another one of those people that's like "Here's 5 Simple Steps to Accept Yourself", because that's not a thing. It takes work, lots of work and lots deprogramming. It's not your fault if you cannot accept who you are. We have everyone around us telling us who we should be, all hours of the day, how could you not believe it?

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There are so many ways to start your journey of self acceptance. Some work better for some and not so good for others. It just really depends on who you are and where you're at. For many, they find that seeing themselves through other peoples eyes is a really good launching pad.


One thing I've learned best over the years is that it doesn't matter what anyone looks like. You are beautiful. You are art. Every winkle, curve, muscle, scar, dimple and stretch mark. Your awkwardly crooked teeth or your extra long 2nd toe. All of it. You're beautiful and you need to see that. Maybe through someone else. Because I know how this works. You need tangible proof. You need to believe it and you'd likely believe someone else's perspective before your own. If that is what helps jump start your journey to self acceptance, GO FOR IT. Whatever helps.

And, I'm not saying all this to be like - you don't need to work out and eat healthy. You don't need to better your mental health, stress or anything like that. We're adults and we are always trying to better ourselves. Be healthy, be productive members in society and have solid relationships with others. So, don't misconstrue the message. Take care of yourself. But, part of self care, is self love. Love yourself.


Every year that goes by, my love of beauty/boudoir sessions grows. But, something happened in the last few months. Maybe, I've hit my threshold for self deprecation? Either way, I am working hard to be another person to flip the expectation of a boudoir sessions. These sessions, wrapped up in a perfect little bow. With the standard allure of fancy lingerie dangling at your ankles, high heels you'd never actually wear out and a garter belt you learned how to use that day.

If that's what you want, to be different, hey that's ok too! Sometimes a change in aesthetic is fun. My focus, however, is getting you in your element. Finding your everyday and showing you the sexy in it. Because, your aesthetic may be leggings and a big t shirt, but, girl... You look good.



My entire focus is to show you that you are still sexy in your world. You are beautiful for all the things you enjoy and excel at. I don't care if all you do is read all day or you're the pinball machine master. It's awesome. You're awesome. And when you feel empowered in even your most redundant tasks and normal hobbies, there is nothing that can stop you.

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In the end, self love and acceptance is important. However you need to achieve that, more power to you. I am so proud of the fact that I can help provide a starting point for women to find their sexuality, see themselves in a different light, feel empowered and sexy. This is one thing I don't think I could ever take for granted. Find your launching pad, your platform. Find yourself. Because everyone around you knows you're great, but maybe you still need a little more convincing.  If you think that you may want to start with me, contact me here! I'd love to hear from you.